January 24, 2010

My Two Lives

Now that I have completed a year of service (plus 3 months of training) and I've had the opportunity to visit stateside, I've had some time to reflect on this past year and the experiences I've had. While home, most people asked me simply, "How's it going over there?" and that is quite the loaded question really and I often answered, "Well, good and bad...such is life for most people, right? For me in Peace Corps, the highs are high and the lows have been my lowest lows."

My experiences both here in Vanuatu and the visit home has helped me dissect what is it that makes me/us happy? We in the "western, modern" society have plentiful choices (the menu of drinks at a coffeeshop or the number of cereals, ice cream, bread and so on), material things (so many people have iPhones now), luxuries (there's medication to help eyelashes grow? Really?) and technology (the amazing twitterability to not only stay in touch with hundreds of friends but to know their hourly play by play).


Then there's my village life...simple and primitive. No electricity which means no T.V., internet, no Starbucks or Walmarts, no Blackberries, no cold drinks or fast food, little to no access to the people outside of the country although people do travel by ship sometimes to other islands. Stores here are small, carrying only some necessary items...rice, tin fish, soap, candles and such.


Most of our days consist of being awaken by the sound of roosters crowing (although they crow almost hourly, no alarm clock) by 6am although my Mama gets up at 4am, then building a fire to make tea and boil some plantains for breakfast. Afterwards, kids are sent off to school, some washing is done, feeding of the pigs and chicken that roam free around the house, moving the cows, cutting wood, and then a hike to the gardens (and I do mean hike because of the hills). Lunch of boiled kumala (sweet potato) and island cabbage then a nap because it's too hot to do anything else! By 5pm, the men often drink kava together and the women are preparing for dinner, washing some more and caring for the children. Lots of time is spent just hanging out, sitting and "storian" or chatting. When do we ever have time to do that unless we plan meals together or weekends? I eat dinner with my family around 6pm, take a bucket shower, read in bed by 8:30am and asleep by 10p. What a life.

The Ni-Vanuatu lead simple but happy lives without being inundated with to do lists, schedules, TV programs and activities. And really, they don't know any better although I storian with them about my life in the states and how busy I always was. It's been two opposite ends of the spectrum...my two lives. Reflecting on both, I appreciate both. If I could just have family and friends here, it would definitely make life easier. Not to mention a shower, flushing toilet and electricity.

So, I realize I will miss this one day...my simple Peace Corps life in the village. It was great to see my friends, their kids and their busy lives which makes me appreciate what I have now more than ever. While it seems selfish to be miserable some days, I can't help but miss my busy life in the states. The grass is always greener, I suppose.

I am off to Paama today...bittersweet. Thanks again, Mom and Dad for your support and to my friends whose well wishes and love help get me through. I think of y'all everyday.

January 4, 2010

Home for the Holidays...and one more year to go

Home for the holidays...one I'll never forget. Much like my Peace Corps experience, the highs have been high and the lows sometimes lower. It's been a whirlwind and I've been overwhelmed physically (it's SOOOO COLD...I've been living near the equator, remember), emotionally (many people to visit but not enough time) and culturally (so many choices, things and characters). Regardless, I feel so fortunate and grateful for the support and love that I have felt from my beloved family and friends.

One thing I never expected to experience was a breakdown here...at home! Peace Corps advised us that it would be tough to acclimate back into society and it's not the abundance of cars, stores, TV programs and material things that set me back but re-connecting with my family and friends. Not only was my time limited which caused guilt for not spending enough time with each person but not having that consistent contact the past 15 months and then trying to resume where you left off was difficult. Babies are born, kids grow up and lives change...

There is no less love or support but missing out on 15 months of my loved ones' lives is quite a bit. I yearn to catch up and make up for that time but it's nearly impossible. Pictures and stories help but I've learned to accept this and enjoy the present. I realize that there is the future with those I love and that Peace Corps is my journey. It's okay to be selfish (yes, I feel selfish) and to embrace this time and place where I am disconnected. It is only 27 months of a lifetime that I will have this opportunity.

First and foremost, I've felt so guilty for not spending more time with my parents. (My mom had to ask me when I could block out time for her!) And above and beyond, my mom and dad have given me the most amazing support through this experience, not to mention my entire life. Not only did they allow their only daughter, their only child, to live on the other side of the world for two years but they've always provided me with the encouragement and ability to discover the world and to grow. Thank you Mom and Dad for a beautiful life.

With only a couple more days left...I wish I had more time with my parents and family. I regret not having more time to spend with friends. I'm sorry if I did not get a chance to see you but know that you all are in my thoughts often (I have lots of time to think). Y'all help get me through and I am forever grateful for your love and support. All my love, amy

Time with my Red Heads

As much as I've missed my friends, it's been difficult missing out on my friends' kids growing up. Hagan's sweet girls, Ivy and Kinley not only remember me well but also knew and knew how to pronounce VANUATU! I got to spend some quality time with them although never enough.
Hagan and I have been friends since kindergarten and went to Carolina together. She's helped me through many obstacles throughout my life and recently when I had my first Peace Corps breakdown. She's an amazing mother who now works full time...I'm always so impressed with how she does it so gracefully. Miss my redheads already.

I'm a Tarheel born...


Okay, so not all of my NC triangle friends are Tarheel fans but it was during my college years and shortly after that I these friendships began...

And not pictured are Timeri and Jon who have been an amazing support during my time in Peace Corps with packages and letters. Much love to you both.

Josh, Amber, Mark, Morgan, Kristen and Jamie

Thrilled to find out that Morgan and Mark are expecting!
Couldn't go to the Raleigh area and not go to my favorite hang out...Snookers. I spent many, many, many evenings here. I miss those league days.

My cousin, Grace and me

January 3, 2010

New Years Eve in CHICAGO

It was a wintery visit to Chicago and Milwaukee. I've missed Chi-town and my fabulous friends there. As always...a great time, lots of laughs, ample photos and good, clean debauchery. :)
My first night in Chi-town

Dinner in Milwaukee (Alex & Adam joined us...our last meeting was in Vanuatu & New Zealand)

My Chi-town ladies




Asian sensations ;)
No caption needed

A White Christmas - Eden, NC...my hometown

My parent's restaurant, Peking Pagoda. I spent many years hanging out here.


MOM
DAD

Ruthie's daughter Alayna and me

Gorgeous new mom, Lauran and baby StellaHagan, Stella, Lauran and me at King's Inn...the favorite hangout of our high school days
Melissa and son Issac...she and I met in preschool!
Dear old friends...April, Erin (due end of Jan!), Hagan and Lauran at Cracker Barrell...my request!

April, Caroline, Ivy, Cora, Hagan, Kinley and me. GO GIRL POWER!
At least 10 trips to good ole Walmart!