All in a day's work on Paama

KAMP GLOW followup T-shirt painting

My village Mama's attend an agriculture workshop at the RTC
conducted by a teacher from the Agriculture College in Santo

Brianna and I enjoying a sunset boat ride...Wan Smol Bag, an NGO in Port Vila came to Paama to conduct an environment workshop and we tagged along with them

Me with my Paama Mamas...love them!

RTC students attending a practical session in our RTC garden

Field trip with RTC students

Our village nakamal (meeting place) being torn down

The village work together to get wood for the new nakamal roof


Sweet pikininis. Here's Jeremiah...always laughing

Goodbye my Paama BFF

When I first arrived on Paama, I felt alone, sad and terrified about starting a new life in a strange place with its relentless pests and heat but after getting over these discomforts (kind of), it’s the relationships I’ve formed that have helped me through. The RTC having to start over after being closed for a year was without a couple teachers and one day when I was hanging out on the beach with some Mamas, I saw this woman who I had a hunch would be able to help me…little did I know that this hunch would bring me an amazing friend, confidante, teacher and leader.

Elsie arrived to Paama eight years ago from Pentecost (another island in Vanuatu), where she was born and grew up. She was a student at an RTC there and also worked in Port Vila. When I approached her about a possible teaching position at the RTC, I had no idea her qualifications and basically went out on a limb. Lucky for me, she was talented, smart and not scared to be involved. It’s been a real challenge here to find individuals who are not embarrassed to talk in front of a group, let alone to teach or lead.

Elsie became an amazing teacher and leader in the community. Not to say that I made her this way, it was always in her, but giving her the opportunity to show her talent and encourage her was all she needed. She’s been a Godsend to me and she often tells the story of how she had dreamed about an angel coming into her life to help her.

A successful year at the RTC and other groups began to recruit her as well. She became the Vice President of the PWMU (Presbyterian Women’s Mission Union) and also a leader in her village. She was also an integral part of the youth camp that Brianna and I held. When she presented and led sessions confidently and enthusiastically, I felt so proud. Along with her work, she tends to her garden, village fundraisers, events and raises two sons.

While she progressed professionally, I also found my best friend on Paama. I have my host family, of course, who I adore but Elsie and I enjoyed kava together, talked about life, relationships and had loads of laughs. She was always dependable and I could trust her with anything. I truly felt at home in Paama having her in my life.

Sadly, I had to say goodbye to Elsie. After being away in Port Vila, I arrived back to Paama hearing that she might be leaving and I immediately went to visit her last Friday. She said she was expecting me as I walked up to her as she defeathered a chicken for what turned out to be her “last kakae”. One custom or tradition here are what’s called last kakaes (last meals) which is a goodbye meal before one leaves, as I will have at the end of my service.

Elsie and I prepared food to put on the fire and began making kava, which is the first time I’ve ever prepared kava solely with someone. As we ram the kava, she tells me why she is leaving…
Her husband who is working in Port Vila and has been for a year now, has left her to live in his village and while she’s managed well, she’s also faced hard times with her village and some men have “creeped” her which means coming to her house and wanting to “hang out” or what not. She’s rejected them but rumors start as they will…coconut wireless as it’s called here. The two men were fined, she felt shamed and people just kept talking about her. Jealousy of her new positions, the attention, her friendship with me all likely had a part in her having to leave. Without the support of her husband as well, she found she could not stay.

I was devastated to be losing my best friend as well as an RTC teacher. I cried, she cried, we drank kava and tried not to think about her leaving and the next morning I walked with her to the airport. Gave her a couple photos of her and her kids and one of her and me with a note about how our friendship will always be.

Since then, I’ve talked to her several times and she’s found work in Port Vila so while I won’t get to spend time with her here in Paama, I’ll join her for a shell of kava whenever I'm in Port Vila.

KAMP GLOW and BILD

Incessant rain during the month of March drenched Paama almost daily and as Brianna and I planned for a three day Kamp G.L.O.W. (Girls leading our world) and one day B.I.L.D (Boys in leadership development ), we were anxious about whether it would prevent the youth from attending. We were also awaiting the arrival of supplies such as T-shirts, paint, folders and prizes. In addition, we were without the help of Epi Peace Corps Volunteers who were unable to come because of the rough waters caused by a couple cyclones in the South Pacific. Brianna arrived to my village with my Papa by canoe in the pouring rain and we prayed for good weather the following day.

We woke to cloudy skies and a sporadic rain drops but a few youth began trickling in and before we knew it, there were 30! We were ecstatic though a bit overwhelmed. Did we have enough materials? Was there enough food? Would facilitators arrive to help present since we scheduled a full day of sessions which would have been difficult for Brianna and I to administer alone.

With 30 participants, we had a packed room where the boys and girls sat respectively on either side with a very distinct division. We began with introductions, Brianna and I going first and the youth council chairman followed by the facilitators which included men and women community leaders, RTC teachers and manager. We combined lecture-style, participatory (although this was difficult with boys and girls combined), group discussion/presentation and role play in our sessions, finding that it was difficult to rally participation with such a large group so breaking up the groups, usually boys and girls was beneficial.

Our morning sessions included Leadership, Communication, Income Projects and How to write a letter. Facilitators were a tremendous help, providing personal experiences and giving Brianna and I time to rest as well as to make sure logistics and food were in order although one of us would always be present for every session.

After lunch, we began with Healthy Relationships in which we discussed domestic violence and had two speakers talk about their relationships with their husband/wife and how they chose he/she, how they share responsibilities and solve problems and fights. We then separated the boys and girls and prepped my RTC manager, Sandy and a teacher to talk to the boys about rape by describing the issues faced in American prisons. This was obviously a heavy conversation and we were unsure of how it went since we were with the girls but Sandy reported that they were shocked and hopefully put the issue in a different perspective.

The afternoon sessions included STI/AIDS in which, Albert, the Liro health clinic nurse came to present. The girls and boys were again split up and condoms, both male and female types were shown. Albert then spoke to the youth about how women in Port Vila, the capital, would sometimes insert a female condom before they go out dancing in case they are raped, although some women would not term it as “rape” but instead “something that just happens to women.” We were shocked but not surprised because although the treatment of women can be deemed worse in other developing countries where women have no human rights, it sadly remains a prevalent issue in Vanautu.

The following two days, we led sessions about female and male reproductive organs, condom usage, resume writing, gossip, goal making and youth in action with the hope that they would share what they’d learned with other youth in their villages. Since the conclusion of our KAMP, we’ve received supplies and will be holding a follow-up workshop to paint shirts.

Our three day KAMP GLOW (& one day BILD) was everything we’d hoped it would be and we were worn out. Having to participate in every session without the help of other PCVs was demanding but well worth the exhaustion. It was truly a highlight of my service on Paama.

Laplap and Laughs

Paama Mamas making laplap

Batman

Embrace NOW

Just finished reading The Power of Now by E. Tolle and so much of what I took from this book has made me realize that I must embrace what is happening this very moment…that the “noise” we so often listen to in our heads can be way too cumbersome to our psyche. Instead of thinking about the past…wishing to get a moment back or wanting to erase a bad memory… it’s all putting too much pressure on us and preventing happiness, contentment, enlightenment so to speak. Likewise thinking about the future (which I am very much guilty of doing)…the indulgences of Port Vila to come in 34 days or the next chapter of my life after Peace Corps also prevent me from truly enjoying this time here. I have plenty of time to think, reminisce and pine but instead I need to be present and to not think so much and to push out the noise.

And interestingly enough, the Ni Vanuatu may have it all figured out. Like I’ve mentioned before, they lead a simple life on the islands…they go to the gardens every few days in order to feed themselves or make a mat for an upcoming event but otherwise, there’s less noise. Daily, you find the people here are sitting around, chatting and enjoying nature. There’s no hurry here…when I say “island time”…it truly explains what life on the islands is about.

When I do get to go to the capital, Port Vila, I am always busy, getting work done, meeting up with friends and attending various social events. While on the islands, my days are rarely filled with busy work. RTC class, a meeting (starting hours later, if at all) or event (again, starting hours later) on the islands happen weekly and the rest of the time is spent gardening, preparing food, eating, enjoying nature with family and friends and oftentimes waiting. As for me, reading of course, watching Heroes and movies (thanks, Ivan!) and various other projects help to fill my time and as the sun is setting, I make visits to households to storian with my village, eat and in bed by 9pm. And that’s island life…one that I am learning daily to embrace and enjoy.

My Sunset 32nd Birthday

My family and I started loosely planning my birthday party a week ahead…who to invite (the village, community, elders?, to send invites?), food (of course laplap and cake) and venue (ah…the event planner in me, getting to use the word venue…fantastic).

Wonderful Ivan sent care packages filled with goodies…cookies, glowsticks, a bottle of whiskey for my papas and uncles (as well as mental relief for me of movies and Heroes). My mama, sister and best friend Elsie began food preparations in the morning…my sister and I grating manioc (my fav) for laplap, baking cakes and my mama killing a couple chickens in minutes, I can attest.

My papa set up a tented area on the sandbeach, some uncles and brothers began ramming kava, building a bond fire and kids picking beautiful flowers for décor. Was this really happening? A full on birthday party?
I was tired after making food (remember, this means over a smoking, hot wood burning fire), carrying mats to the beach and setting up but seeing it all pulled together I was ecstatic. By 5pm, people started arriving with food and some with presents…I received 5 island dresses, soap and laundry detergent (very common birthday presents on Paama) and got doused with baby powder (previous posts explain this custom). I got to join the papas and brothers for kava and conversation (storian) then hula hooped with the kids and helped mamas share food. The sun began setting, they sang happy birthday/hapi long laef and with a nice kava buzz, glowsticks glittering, we ate and laughed together. A fabulous 32nd birthday indeed.

MidService Reflection

After an indulgent couple months away from site, I arrive back to Paama’s small airport in Tavie where my host Papa greets me and we row the canoe about 40 minutes to my village…in the rain. During the arduous but peaceful (although this time wet) canoe ride to my home, I find out that some guys had broken into my hut by cutting the screen and then stealing various items of which were mostly returned. (Mom and Dad, don’t worry, I’m very safe here, promise)

So, not only was my hut infested with ants (which I then have to massacre) and spiders (which I don’t mess with because they eat other bugs) but I also come back to it broken into. My Papa forewarned me and explained how all the chiefs and elders from the nearby villages came together after having caught the young man who committed the crime as well as to meet to discuss apologizing to me.

That's my house on the left side, nestled in the hill, RTC has the white roof.

I was disheartened a bit …a new year, my last 12 months of service and it’s not started out quite positively. On the contrary though, I was comforted…a blessing in disguise really.
It was late when I was settled and after unpacking a little, had dinner, I was under my mosquito net falling asleep to the sound of the singing crickets and insect orchestra…not wanting to think about readjusting back to village life nor this fiasco. My meeting with the community chiefs and elders would take place in the morning.

I awoke to the roosters crowing and birds whistling, did my usual morning yoga and then coffee. I made my way down to the nakamal (village gathering place and also a place to drink kava) where they awaited to meet with me. The Tahi chief, Joshua (28 year old new chief who I work with and respect a great deal) began the meeting with an explanation of what occurred, apologies from the village and how much they hoped I would not want to leave. The chiefs and elders of neighboring villages stood up to apologize and appeal to any desire of my wanting to leave. A Mama also gave a speech.

After their toktoks (speeches), it was my turn to respond. And here’s what I said in Bislama (followed by its translation)

Mi tink se yufala bin tink bae mi cros wetem wanem I hapin mo mi no harem gud.
I think that you all have thought that I would be angry with what happened and that I would not be happy.

Be mi harem gud from se mi save yufala bin tink hevi long wanem I bin hapin mo bin tink abaot tink tink blong mi mo wanem bae mi mekem.
But I am happy because I know you all have been worried about what has happened and how I would feel /react.

Taem we mi bin stap long Amerika, mi no bin tink abaot ol samting long haos blong mi, be mi bin tink abaot yufala…ol famili blong mi long Paama.
When I was in America, I did not think about all the things in my house, I was thinking about you all, my family in Paama.

So I continued to talk about how a year has passed and how at home I felt here. My village and community truly are a family and I feel entirely safe here. (Mom and Dad, again, don’t worry!) They actually thought I would want to leave Paama. But I explained how could I leave family when I only have a year left with them?

This gave way to a good time to reflect on a year passed, now midway…several weeks in as I write this and as another volunteer, Sandy Su explains it so well…

A “mid service meltdown…what is it about being smack dab in the middle of something that freaks even the most rational of human beings out so much? From the infamous midlife crisis to the dreaded ‘hump day’ or even getting the middle seat on an airplane, people who find themselves in the midst of things tend to get a little uncomfortable.

Maybe it’s the fact that you’re caught equally between the beginning and the end so you can’t help but worry about both the past and the future at the same time. The end isn’t in sight yet and the novelty and excitement of the situation you had at the beginning has worn off. Maybe it’s that upon reflection of the past you realize things aren’t where you hoped they would be at this point, so you panic a little.”

So, there are good days and bad (thus is life) and tears still come and go some days because a year still does seem like a long time. It also makes me think about how difficult and sad it will be to leave when my service is complete. The strong and everlasting bond I’ve formed with this place, these people who will forever be a part of me.

They often tell stories about Jamie, a former volunteer here in my village and what a legend he is! And they talk about how alike I am to Jamie, in the sense that I am so well integrated and part of the Paama family. What a complement this is and I realize that as much as I come here to “help” them…in so many ways, they are helping me grow, learn and discover what life is all about.